MAMA NEEDS WINE…OR VODKA…OR BOTH

Do y’all ever have those weeks where you are literally just trying to get through each day with all 5 kids alive? 

No. I’m serious.

I’ve given up on making sure they are fed and bathed. I’m just trying to keep these tiny humans alive. 

Let’s start with Jude. This kid should have just been a monkey. He’s a climbing, hitting, screaming fool. Since his vocab isn’t quite up to par, he just screams and swats and head butts stuff. WTF child. Use your words and it wouldn’t be such an issue. If you turn your back on him for 2 seconds….literally 2 SECONDS…the kid has dragged a chair across the kitchen and scaled to the highest cupboards possible to retrieve whatever snack he’s in the mood for. I seriously want to throat punch him some days. 

Here I busted him smashing grahm crackers. At least EAT them and don’t smash them. Shm. Don’t get me wrong, nothing is sweeter than his chubby little hands wrapping around my neck and squishing me in the biggest hug ever, but this kid challenges me like no other child ever has. Stubborn. 

Look at this sweet and innocent face. Yep. This is right after he smeared Thieves in his eyeballs. Dear child. Please do not put oils in your eyes dear one. While great on your feet or chest, the eyeballs are not the best place to work on building your immune system.

But every now and then there are moments of pure joy and glee and I LOVE his belly laugh. It’s so contagious. My little sports bean who tackles everything he tries head on. 

And then there’s Emryk. He’s 3. That should pretty clearly explain the situation. Mr. I do it myself, I’m always right, my way or the highway, master of messes as well. He’s also so independent and creative…creative enough to use an ENTIRE jar of hair glue on his head while I was making dinner. It only took 10 minutes of hot water massage and 1/2 bottle of kidscents shampoo to get it out. I forced myself to laugh or I might have been busted crying. 

Have you ever seen so much hair product on one head??? He woke up today like my head is itchy. Yea, well I wonder why.

Oh. The yellow ink pad he found in Ayden’s drawer? Decided to stamp on all our freshly painted walls in the bigs room. Lord help me.

These 2 firecrackers. They are either going to keep me young or kill me…or turn me into a raging alcoholic. Time will tell.

So, to all you mama’s just trying to get from day to day and keep your peeps alive. 

I get it. 

I totally totally get it. 

I have ZERO judgement for you whether you put yourself in timeout or pour yourself a glass of vodka by noon on Friday. After all, we are celebrating that we made it, right? 

CHEERS!

ORIGINAL POST 2/3/17

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